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趣味英語雙語笑話
下面是小編跟大家分享的趣味英語笑話,歡迎閱讀!
第一則:歌德的容忍
Goethe's Tolerance
Goethe was once strolling on a narrow path in a park in Weimar. As luck would have it, he met with a critic who was hostile to him. Both of them stopped, staring at each other. Then the critic said.
"I will never make way for a fool."
"But I will," with that Goethe retreated aside.
歌德的容忍
有一次,歌德在魏瑪一個(gè)公園的小路上散步。那條小路很窄,偏偏遇上了一個(gè)對他心存敵意的評論家。他們都停下來看著對方。評論家開口了:
“我從來不會(huì)給一個(gè)傻瓜讓路!
“但我會(huì)!闭f完,歌德退到一旁。
第二則:您的大衣著火了
Your Coat Is on Fire
The master, to impress on his pupils the need of thinking before speaking, told them to count fifty before saying anything important, and one hundred if it was very important.
The next day he was speaking, standing with his back to the fire, when he noticed several lips moving rapidly. Suddenly the whole class shouted: "Ninety-eight, ninety-nine, a hundred. Your coat is on fire, sir!"
您的大衣著火了
老師為了讓學(xué)生記住先思考后發(fā)言,告訴他們在說出重要事情之前先數(shù)到50,如果是特別重要的事情,要先數(shù)到100。 第二天,當(dāng)老師背靠著火爐講課時(shí),發(fā)現(xiàn)好幾個(gè)學(xué)生的嘴唇在很快地不停地動(dòng)。突然,全班學(xué)生一起喊道:“九十八,九十九,一百。老師,您的大衣著火了!”
第三則:我是司機(jī)
I am the Driver
The bus was crowded, and as one more man tried to get on, the passengers wouldn't let him aboard.
"It's too crowded," they shouted. "What do you think you are?"
"I'm the driver," he said.
我是司機(jī)
一輛公共汽車已經(jīng)相當(dāng)擁擠,還有一個(gè)人想擠進(jìn)來,乘客不讓他上去。
“太擠了,”他們喊道,“你以為你是誰?”
“我是司機(jī)!彼卮鹫f。
第四則:丑女
An Ugly Woman
Mike: My aunt was very embarrassed when she was asked to take off her mask at the party.
Mary: Why was that?
Mike: She wasn't wearing one.
丑女
麥克:一次舞會(huì)上,當(dāng)大家要求我姑姑拿掉她的面具時(shí),她非常尷尬。
瑪麗:為什么會(huì)那樣呢?
麥克:她根本就沒有帶面具。
第五則:巧合
Coincidence
A woman was singing. One of the guests turned to a man by his side and criticized the singer.
"What a terrible voice!" he said. "Do you know who she is?"
"Yes," was the answer. "She is my wife."
"Oh, I beg your pardon." The man said, "Of course her voice is not bad, but the song is very bad. I wonder who wrote that awful song."
"I did." was the answer.
巧合
一位女士正在唱歌。一位客人轉(zhuǎn)身對他旁邊的男士批評道:
“多難聽的嗓音!”他說,“你知道她是誰嗎?”
“知道,”男士回答,“她是我太太!
“噢,請你原諒。”客人說,“當(dāng)然,她的嗓音并不壞,但那歌實(shí)在太差了。我想知道那是誰寫的歌!
“是我。”男士回答道。
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